


I Am Real

by Nihonkikuasa211



Category: Code Black (TV)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Implied/Referenced Death to Drug Addiction, Past Drug Addiction, Post 1x18
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-17
Updated: 2016-04-17
Packaged: 2018-06-02 17:19:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6575149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nihonkikuasa211/pseuds/Nihonkikuasa211
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Of course I am real." When Mario becomes blank after a patient dies, Angus comforts his friend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Am Real

**Author's Note:**

> This is something that has always been in my mind since the heroin drug epidemic was reported. I hope to write a longer story later.

                                                                                 _I Am Real_

            “Look at me.”

            Mario didn’t respond. The dark-haired resident continued to refuse to meet Angus’ eyes, even though Angus knew of the kind of pain he must be hiding inside.

            Mario’s hands were clenched, the tendons stretched tight and the skin white as paste as the resident continued to look at the floor.

            “Mario.” Even to his own name, the resident didn’t respond. Angus almost sighed through his teeth. _Why does he have to do this? Again?_ Angus’ mind flashed back to how Mario had been by his side the past few weeks. The image of his friend telling him to tell him anything surfaced as the said friend was refusing to talk to him about his _own_ problems. Friend. It wasn’t a word Angus thought he would describe Mario as. When they had first met, the resident had thought they would become enemies dislike each other with every time they looked at each other. At first, that was how it was. Angus remembered of how both of them argued over a patient, Mario telling him that he should work out sometime. It almost made Angus want to laugh out loud when he had said that he would only work out when Mario went to therapy. _Who knew that I would need therapy? Someone like me?_

Mario made no comments when he found Angus staring blankly at the locker sometimes after a session with substance abuse addicts, or pressing his hand to his face at yet another message from his therapist. The resident didn’t judge him when he sometimes snapped at Mike, telling him he was fine and _leave him alone._ Angus always apologized afterwards, but the guilt and remorse after what he had done to the man who meant so much to him refused to leave him.

            Somehow Mario made it better. Angus didn’t know what caused him to be so…himself again in those harrowing days after Adderall. Perhaps Mario understood parts of him that weren’t part of the addiction. Perhaps that was why Angus was trying to talk to the resident now, even though the dark aura and despair surrounding the young man was enough to make even Mike leave him alone.

            “Mario.” The name was whispered softly. Almost reverently, as if the name meant so much to the person uttering it. _It does._ Looking at his friend trying to hide the pain as he had done too many times in his life, Angus realized then of how much this man standing before him meant to his heart. “Mario.” Slowly, the resident raised his head and Angus looked through the dark pools of anger and sadness. “Hey.” A small smile framed Angus’ face as he looked towards his friend. “I’m here.” He took a breath. “So you can tell me what’s going on in your mind.”

            For a moment Mario didn’t respond. Angus almost thought he had forgotten how to speak, for his mouth moved but no sound came out. The dark eyes looked into blue, glancing briefly as if afraid.

            “No one understands. This… _disease._ ” Mario spat out the word as if it was a curse, and his hands continued to be abused by the amount of pressure the resident was placing on them. “So many people die from drugs, Angus…and no one understands.” With a surprising amount of weakness, Mario unclenched his hands and placed them on Angus’ shoulders.

            “It could have been you.” The words, no matter how many times Angus had heard them said, struck a chord in his heart. “That guy lying there without a heartbeat, overdosed from too much heroin. Or me.” Mario sighed deeply, and took his hands away from Angus’ shoulders.

            He didn’t think it would happen.

            But it did.

            There was a faint brush of Mario’s fingertips on his cheek.

            _What…?_ Angus thought blankly at the tender touch. Then, his eyes locked onto to Mario’s expression. An expression comprising of both sadness and relief.

            “I’ve lost so many people I just wanted to make certain you were real.”

            There was a faint hoarseness in Mario’s voice. Angus couldn’t trust himself to speak right then. The two simply stood motionless for a couple moments, hearing the familiar sounds of the ER.

            “Of course I am real, Mario.” The dark-haired resident looked toward his friend, shock echoing against his features as Angus whispered the sincere words slowly. “I am real.”

            Angus’ blue eyes bored into Mario’s dark brown, sincerity coming in waves.

            “I won’t fade away.”


End file.
